· Sample Admission Essay - Veterinary Medicine Aside from humanity, the next interesting and complex creatures on earth are the animals. Not only human beings, but animals, too, are an important subject of scientific research for the puposes of understanding them better and at the same time relating the results of such study to humans for instance in medicine, psychology, and Browse essays about Becoming A Veterinarian and find inspiration. Learn by example and become a better writer with Kibin’s suite of essay help services. Essay Examples Mastering the VMCAS Personal Essay I n t ro d u ct i o n T h i s f re e g u i d e t o ma st e ri n g t h e V MCA S P e rso n a l E ssa y i s b ro u g h t t o yo u b y L o o p A b ro a d, t h e l e a d e r i n p re -ve t e ri n a ry a n d ve t e ri n a ry st u d y a b ro a d p ro g ra ms
Veterinary Medicine - Med School Application Essay Edited
EssayEdge significantly improves each essay using the same voice as the author. The only way to evaluate editing is to compare the original essay with the edited version. We vet school application essay examples improve essays both for clients who write poorly and for clients who write well. How about the rush of excitement surrounding Earth Day in junior high? Was it my high school science teacher who revealed the truth about endangered species, habitat loss, acid rain, and ozone layer depletion?
When I look back and try to pinpoint the moment when I started to see things differently, too many events come to mind. I know that it did not happen in one day. From the time I saw David Suzuki talk on deforestation and our ecological footprint, to the time I euthanized my first litter of kittens because of pet overpopulation, my life has been a process of continual learning and discovery.
Not all the lessons have been pleasant. Sometime while studying the harmful effects of large-scale farming during college, I realized that I needed to do more than merely recycle cola bottles, avoid aerosol cans, and make vet school application essay examples that my animals were neutered. I needed to do more. This process of discovery began in rural Canada, where I spent the first six years of my life as an only child. My pets were my constant companions.
I played make-believe not with dolls or with other little girls, but with the barn cats who were nice enough to tolerate the dresses and baby carriages.
My sheep dog, Charlie, treated me as one of his flock, herding me from place to place as he saw fit. When my sister and cousins were born, they became part of my circle of friends, but Charlie and the other animals were never excluded from our games. I simply assumed everyone loved animals as much as I did. My realization that this was not true came in the fourth grade when I witnessed a harrowing act of animal cruelty.
Two older children with a sadistic streak tied one of my classmates to a tree and tortured his kitten in front of him. I cried for weeks. I have since encountered numerous other cases of atrocities committed against animals, especially through my work at an SPCA. In disbelief, I have witnessed the results of dogs being dragged behind snowmobiles, cats left out to freeze, horses starved to death, vet school application essay examples, and innumerable puppies and kittens being thrown away like so much garbage.
Determined to help stop the abuse, I became involved with activism and policy, assisting in fundraising and letter writing campaigns to protest the unfair treatment of animals.
While earning vet school application essay examples B. in Agriculture, vet school application essay examples, I learned that the family farm is an antiquated and outmoded ideal.
Farming has become big business. The result of large-scale industrial farming is the overcrowding of animals in inhumane conditions, excessive antibiotic and pesticide use, vet school application essay examples, and devastating clearcutting of the rainforest. Knowing that I had to contribute to environmental protection on a personal level, I made vet school application essay examples decision to eat only free range meat.
Limiting my meat consumption proved no easy task, particularly since free range meat is often hard to obtain in small quantities and is prohibitively expensive for most college students.
Finally, convinced by the literature on animal welfare and the environmental movement, vet school application essay examples, I decided to give vegetarianism a try. Giving up meat was perhaps the most difficult thing I have ever done, yet I knew that proper policy-making had to start with personal sacrifices. It took me two full years to master my cravings and become a lacto-ovo vegetarian.
Vegetarianism complemented my ever-increasing interest in animal rights and environmentalism. From the time I was a little girl, vet school application essay examples, I have always known that I wanted to be a veterinarian.
Nonetheless, my newfound concern for policy suddenly opened up several previously unconsidered career paths. At first, I found the abundance of possibilities daunting. Not wanting to take vet school application essay examples year off school, I decided to enroll in a few graduate courses to see where they led me. I thought it was too good to be true; the program seemed to match my background, interests, and aspirations perfectly.
I had no idea that such a program actually existed. We have become dangerously blasé about the ecological diversity surrounding us, and I believe that, in order to preserve what is left, cases of animal abuse must be treated as serious crimes. By understanding and shaping animal welfare policy, I believe that I will be able to leverage my knowledge of veterinary medicine to make a powerful case in defense of animal rights.
You took what I said, kept vet school application essay examples same tone and modified it to make it sound great!! I will keep you posted on how I make out. Your essay is packed with interesting details, and it was a pleasure to work on this piece.
Despite its comprehensive and engaging style, your essay did contain a few weaknesses. Your grammar and phrasing were awkward in parts, and a few of your transitions were too abrupt or were missing altogether. In addition, your conclusion was too abstract; you should always anchor your arguments in concrete detail. In your note, you inquired about the desirability of giving a title to your essay.
Titles are unnecessary in application essays, and admissions officials generally prefer that they be omitted. If you print your essay on a separate sheet of paper, I suggest that you simply include the question in italics at the top of the sheet.
Your revised essay is well within the word limit, and I have illustrated a few places in which you might want to add additional information to make your passages more concrete. As for sentence level changes, I concentrated on refining your language, highlighting your most vivid and interesting ideas, and making the logic of your ideas stand out more clearly. I rephrased passages that contained slightly awkward English, eliminated phrases or sentences that seemed extraneous or repetitive, and varied vocabulary to render the text more lucid and interesting.
Your use of rhetorical questions is effective in this introduction, but I have reworked your original first paragraph to give it more style and verve. I transformed two of your original questions into a statement, since having too many questions in a row makes the rhythm of your introduction uninteresting.
By varying sentence structure, and by breaking up your first paragraph into two parts, I have provided a new introduction that is compelling and vivid without bogging the reader down in a swamp of interrogatives.
The description of your childhood connection to animals is strong, but I have shown how you can make the passage even more compelling. You were missing a strong transition between the second and third paragraphs, vet school application essay examples. See the transition I have provided. The description of your developing social conscience is very effective, vet school application essay examples. Nonetheless, I suggest slight adjustments to verbiage to make your points more powerful.
You need to draw out the logic of why it is bad that farming has become big business. See the new sentence I have proposed which addresses the new ecological concerns raised by industrial farming. You should add a word or two about the graduate courses you took.
What did you study? I have streamlined the discussion of your indecision to avoid the impression that your interests were unfocused. The logic of this transition sentence is not entirely clear. Your activism complements your vegetarianism, so I rephrased this transition to better highlight the synergy between your two activities.
Apart from the obvious fact that through both activities you will be helping animals, it was not very clear from the original essay how you plan to combine veterinary science and policy. I have addressed this by connecting the two ideas with the following sentence:. Your original final paragraph was too abstract and dreamy. It is best to avoid waxing poetic at the end of your essay. Instead, I suggest ending your essay with the previous paragraph, vet school application essay examples, ensuring that it concludes on a concrete and memorable note.
Congratulations on a great essay and on a very interesting career path. I wish you the best of luck in the admissions process. See this essay before the edit. Skip to content. June 20, The following are specific comments on the individual paragraphs of your essay: Paragraph 1 Your use of rhetorical questions is effective in this introduction, but I have reworked your original first paragraph to give it more style and verve.
Paragraph 2 The description of your childhood connection to animals is strong, but I have shown how you can make the passage even more compelling. Paragraph 4 The description of your developing social conscience is very effective, vet school application essay examples. Paragraph 6 You should add a word or two about the graduate courses you took. Sincerely, vet school application essay examples, Your EssayEdge Editor See this essay before vet school application essay examples edit.
Make your medical essay stand out with EssayEdge professional editors. Find Out More. EssayEdge customers and authorized clients can leave a comment. Please register to leave a comment. Leave a Comment Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. Name Email CustomerId. All rights reserved. Privacy Policy Terms of Service. Log In Sign Up. Reset password Please enter your email address to request a password reset. Log In. This information is used to create your account First Name Please enter your name.
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Vet School Personal Statement Tips
, time: 4:50· Sample Admission Essay - Veterinary Medicine Aside from humanity, the next interesting and complex creatures on earth are the animals. Not only human beings, but animals, too, are an important subject of scientific research for the puposes of understanding them better and at the same time relating the results of such study to humans for instance in medicine, psychology, and Browse essays about Becoming A Veterinarian and find inspiration. Learn by example and become a better writer with Kibin’s suite of essay help services. Essay Examples Mastering the VMCAS Personal Essay I n t ro d u ct i o n T h i s f re e g u i d e t o ma st e ri n g t h e V MCA S P e rso n a l E ssa y i s b ro u g h t t o yo u b y L o o p A b ro a d, t h e l e a d e r i n p re -ve t e ri n a ry a n d ve t e ri n a ry st u d y a b ro a d p ro g ra ms
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